Literacy, Faith and How it All Came Together

I’ve been in church since I was a kid.  I went to Sunday School, sat through services and even attended a Christian school.  Needless to say, I was pretty well versed in the Bible by the time I was a teenager.  I knew everything there was to know about my faith and the Bible…or so I thought.  As an adult, I grew to realize almost everything I “knew” about my faith and the Bible was what I was told or taught, not necessarily what I believed to be true.

It wasn’t until I had my daughter Kaila that I really came into my own faith in God.  When she was five months old she was diagnosed with a severe heart condition and had to have open-heart surgery.  For months after her surgery she remained in congestive heart failure, despite all of the medications we had to administer to her daily.  Her case was rare so her doctors had no answers.  They searched across the country for similar cases to help them with her treatment.  Finally they told us there was nothing more they could do except keep her stable on medications and a restricted lifestyle until she was ten.  We were told at that point she would need a heart transplant; I was devastated and angry.  I couldn’t understand how or why God would allow this to happen.  Why did my child have to suffer like this, and furthermore, for her to live another child would need to die! I struggled for months with my faith and my emotions.  Finally, I came to the point where I helplessly waved my white flag in surrender.  I remember standing over her crib, tired and defeated, I prayed, and told God how there was nothing more the doctors could do, how I couldn’t go on like this, and to either heal her or take her. 

About a month after this emotional breakdown, Kaila had an appointment with her Cardiologist.  She was supposed to get another round of meds to add to her daily routine.  Each visit began with an ultrasound of her heart to check her progress, which until this point was none.  The doctor was shocked to see that she had actually made progress, not only progress but had jumped up to where she should be in her recovery.  No one could explain why, except me; I knew that day I prayed, God answered.  Two months later at another ultrasound I noticed the technician double-checking the video from her last appointment and her current pictures.  She couldn’t understand how she had improved even more in such a short time.  At that appointment they took her off of all her medications.  We call Kaila our miracle baby for obvious reasons.

This experience was a crucial point in my life.  I really found my own faith because of my daughter.  I began to get more involved in my church and explore the Bible for myself.  I found that there were things that I had been taught that were wrong, and I discovered God on my own.  I learned to throw out everything I knew and start fresh.  I still had people who I trusted to go to and get advice if I needed it; those people became invaluable to me. 

It was around this time I decided to get involved in teaching in Children’s Church.  I had to prepare lessons and be ready to teach a class of 5-9 year olds.  I really enjoyed teaching them, they had such excitement to be there and they made it fun.  After a while, my husband and I were approached to help out with our church youth group.  While I liked teaching the younger kids, I loved teaching the teenagers.  I really had it in my heart to help them find their faith on their own apart from their parents, while being there for them through everything they were going through in life.  I knew firsthand how important that had been for me.

Teaching youth was a completely different experience.  Most of the time we had to prepare our own lessons, unlike in Children’s Church where we had a curriculum to follow.  I had to really get into the Bible and analyze it, sometimes interpret it, and find practical life application for these kids.  While it was difficult, it was also very rewarding.  Not only did we build great relationships with these kids, but I learned so much more about the Bible.  Most of these kids are in college now. My husband and I still have a close relationship with them.  We are now mentoring a few of them to become the next youth leaders for our kids.

Through all of these experiences, I became literate in the Bible and my faith, but they have also prepared me for my journey as a teacher.  As an English major, I often have to analyze texts, write papers, and eventually lesson plans. I feel that all those years of analyzing the Bible to solidify my faith has been preparation for this point.  The years I spent working with the youth has prepared me to work with teenagers.  Now, as I venture into a new ministry in my church, Special Needs, I will be prepared for my next goal of getting my Special Ed certification.

I have been through a lot to get where I am today but I wouldn’t change a thing.  I see how everything that has happened has prepared me for another part of my life.  Kaila turns ten this year and she has no restrictions and there is no more talk of a heart transplant.  As a matter of fact, now when she goes to the Cardiologist they marvel at how “normal” she appears.  Last year her doctor told us that if he didn’t know how sick she had been, he would never be able to tell.